Parenting - Never Say Never

OK, I'm gonna do it.  I said I would never do it.  But I am.

Blog a series on parenting.

Gulp.

First, why did I say I would never do it?  Lots of reasons but the main ones are

 1)I don't think I have anything to say that hasn't already been said. Plenty of good material out there - why should I of all people add to the noise?
 2) I don't want my kids to feel pressured to some artificial standard of performance.  They are really great kids but they are as human as the rest of us and they are gonna make some mistakes.  Why should they be subject to public scrutiny just b/c their Mom has a big mouth?  and
 3) I'm not done.  Who knows if what I have to say is "effective"?
  

But I am allowing myself the perennial female perogative of changing my mind. Here are the reasons - 

1) I've shared my opinions in conferences , counseling and casual conversations and have been well received. Although I've heard this stuff before, apparently I predate enough of you for some of it to seem new. 

2) My kids have encouraged me to share whatever I know.... Perhaps because they secretly know its not much at all and hopefully because they know I will strive never to embarrass them but rather to tell alot of dirt on myself. Which will make for alot of laughs for us all

And 3) I've realized I'll never be done. Parenting is forever. The stage just changes

So here it comes. My series on parenting.  I have no idea how many posts I'll have nor what all subjects we'll cover. If you have an idea of something you'd like to dialogue about, please let me know.

Here's some of the suggestions some of you have asked that we touch on -

building sibling relationships
discipline
kids and money
tattling
creating a family kids want to be a part of
ideas on chores
picky eaters
developing healthy eaters (yes, I will be honest about where I fail!!!)
education
how to disciple children
passing along your faith
parenting adult children


What else are you interested in?
 

Parenting Posts Coming

Paul and I had the privilege to speak at a parenting conference this past weekend.  "Modern Family".  Together we talked about "kids and money" and then I did a session on Moms and Daughters.  (This one was a hoot!  I drafted my Mom, my daughter Katie, - and my granddaughter Mary Alice!! to come with me and they brought down the house!)  Over the next few days, I'll share these same ideas with y'all.

Be on the lookout for "5 Things Kids Need to Know about Money"  and "Moms and Daughters - Building a Bond for Generations"

In coming posts.....

Thank you for your feedback!  Some of the topics you mentioned will show up over the next several weeks.  Suggestions included parenting, homeschooling, being a good in law, discipline tips, more recipes, frugality, and organization.  I will share my own ideas and experiences as well as  some  websites to recommend.

To start us off, I want to pass along a site for homeschooling families that has been so helpful to me.  Fast Transcipts has been an excellent resource for grades and transcript preparation.  It is extremely reasonable and has provided invaluable support for me.  Here's the link :

  http://www.fasttranscripts.com/

This company also provides a service for maintaining and reporting attendance reports. Homeschool Compliance.  It has saved me much time and avoided much worry!  Please check it out -

https://www.homeschoolcompliance.com

And, when you do, tell Scott I sent you :)

Thanks!!

Something God says about parenting.....

I'm pretty reluctant to give parenting advice.  For one thing, I'm not done yet!  Even though my primary contributing author role has passed in a couple of my Living Letters, the ink is far from dry on the others. By God's grace, things look pretty good so far, but I'll not ever consider myself a parenting expert.  It's just way too hard and way too complicated for me to glibly pass along many "how to" tidbits for Moms.

But I do have some encouragement to share.  From the one from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name.  Just take a look at what our Heavenly Father promises to do for us in Exodus 20....


The backdrop is in verse 5, where He warns His people not to worship or serve anyone or anything but Him.  To say that the consequences of such sin is undesirable is a major understatement -- our disobedience predisposes subsequent generations to fall prey to the same thing.  That's what is meant by "visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children and on the third and fourth generation."  The verse does not mean that God punishes the children for the sins of the parents!!  If you want further support for that, check out Ezekiel 18:20.  Not what that verse means at all.  The Hebrew word for "visiting" is "paqad" and it means "to review, inspect, number, take a census".  In other words, God's not going to zap your kids on account of your critical spirit, addictive behavior, immorality, selfish ambition,  greed, or obsessive fears  - but if you were to take a spiritual/emotional family history, those same sins would show up through the line, time after time.  God's stating what will result - not what He causes. 

Here's the good news -  but showing lovingkindness, to thousands, to those who love Me and keep My commandments.  Exodus 20:6.    The word for "showing" is powerful.  It's so strong.  "Asah".  While verse 5's "visiting" is a passive observing, "asah" is active  - it means to create, to construct, to labor, to accomplish.  WOW!!!  Do you see what God is saying?  He will take our obedience and love, frail as they may be, and He will build into our posterity fortresses of grace and blessing and love and benevolence and favor and honor  - His lovingkindness. 

It's too good to be true!!  Except that it is.  So very like Him.  Above and beyond what we can ask or imagine.  He will take my heart to serve Him (which is only possible to begin with by His grace!) and then, He will build into my children and my grandchildren and my great grandchildren BLESSING.  Favor that they did not earn.  Just cuz I believe and obey...and cuz He's good and generous.

Every parent I know tries to do the best job possible.  I'm sure someone can find an exception somewhere but I don't know any.  Every parent wants their child to be better off than they were.  And they will do everything they know of to make that come true.  Well, now you know how to be sure it happens.  Cooperate with God.  Don't worry so much about what the parenting books tell you to do - just obey God.  Serve Him with your whole heart.  Let Him transform you... and it'll show up in your children.

Now, I know.  You're thinking of some great parents whose kids messed up royally.  Yeah, me, too.  As in all of us -- we have the perfect Heavenly Father....and we still rebel.  To be sure, all of us, including our children, have the freedom to choose our own way.  Sometimes we all do.  But here's what I have to say about that -- first, the story's not over yet.  God's not done.  And, last, I trust His construction.  If He says He is building blessing and grace and honor and favor into their lives because I believe and obey Him, then that's all I need.  I plan to continue to do my part - to love and serve Him.  And I'll trust Him to do His work.

And one day I'll get to look down through history - HIS Story - and see what He has done.  Hallelujah!!!

A litle help, please

I'd like to hear what you want to read about.  Most of the time I just write "stream of consciousness", whatever my heart is beating about at the moment. But I'm sort of stuck in the desert of no ideas so I'd like to know what you readers are interested in - life tips, parenting, faith-walk, friendships, ??? 

Let me hear - either via FB or comment.  Please :)

Thanks, friends!