Less is More - money management for kids


Teaching wise money management to our kids.  We all want to do that.  So how do we explain so many UNwise folks when it comes to money?  Personal bankruptcies are unimaginably high (1 out of every 175 Americans will file for bankruptcy at some point in their lives).  Personal savings rate is 1/3 of what it was 30 years ago (4% of personal income as opposed to 12%).  Even though personal disposable has increased. 

How can we help our kids avoid financial stress, or quite possibly disaster?  I am sure we can't solve the nation's problem but maybe we can make a difference in the future of our own children.  Here are some suggestions:

1.  Most importantly, model it.  Luke 6:40 tells us that "A student is note above his teacher, but, a student, when fully trained, will be like his teacher. " Personally, I think that is the scariest verse in all of Scripture.  But maybe I need to see it as one of the most hopeful.  And as an opportunity.  I know in my own life, I saw my parents live out financial principles such as faithful giving, no debt, and living below your means.  It shaped me permanently.  I realize all of you may not have had the same blessing.  However, see this as your opportunity to "change your family tree", as Dave Ramsey likes to say.  Don't see yourself as handicapped because you didn't see the right money behavior modeled before you!  Be mature enough to take charge and change things for your kids.  Let them see you tithe regularly, pay your taxes honestly, and save consistently.  And let them NOT see you whine because you "can't afford " something.  Instead, let them see you make a choice to delay temporary gratification in view of greater, more permanent good.

2.  The 3 jars.  We began when our children were about 2 or 3 with "the 3 jars."  There are some cuter options available now but we used 3 pickle jars.  Labeled them "Give"  "Save"  "Spend"  and provided our children a weekly allowance.  I will let you in on the beginning amount but promise not to gush over our benevolent generosity.  Each kid started out with $.10.  Yep, 10 pennies.  Paul would sit down on the floor with them and have them stretch their little hands out in front of them.  Then he would lay one penny above each finger.  (Since they were counting, I considered this a Math lesson and counted it as school.  JK!!)  We didn't prescribe the amount but we told them they had to put something  in each jar every week.  The giving was for church or a para-church organization or some mission beyond themselves.  The spending was used any way they wanted to.  And, here's the mean part - the savings jar was for a car.  Talk about delayed gratification!!!  We filled up that savings jar and eventually opened up a savings account for them.  As they got older, they added to those jars on their own and learned how banks worked.

3.  Around age 15, we did a few other things.  Opened a checking account for them and taught them to balance their checkbooks.  Turned over a portion of the monthly clothing budget to them and made them responsible for their own clothes purchases.  Had them sit down with our financial advisor and opened up an investment account for them.  An account which they funded.

4.  Our goal is gradually to move them to be financially independent.  At least from us!  If they get a speeding ticket, they pay it.  If they want to go out to eat with their friends, they pay for it.  Not that we don't ever make an exception or slip them a $20 "just because" but you get the idea.  We want them to have money experiences and responsbility while the risk is low. Before they are out on their own without a clue about taxes and mortgages and credit cards.  (which we DON'T get them, btw)

5.  When it's time to buy their first car, we help them search and research.  And then we match what they have saved.  (We may have to put a cap on the match amount for one particular kid...)

6.  We are open with them about using coupons, reducing costs, saving for  gifts and vacation, and so forth. And we talk about their own buying decisions.  Although we provide input and suggestions, we do NOT dictate how they can spend their money.  Sometimes they blow it.  And, though it's painful to watch, we feel those are necessary lessons. Please do not report us to DFACS for cruelty to children.

7.  Take a small amount of money (we have done $5 or $10) for each family member - parents included.  Distribute the cash and instruct each person to invest the money in the life of another person.  Directly, not as a contribution to a ministry.  Then report back what you did.  (Hand it out on Thanksgiving and set Christmas Eve as the deadline for completion).  We have had so much fun with ths!!  The younger ones will need a little help to implement, of course, but we have all enjoyed this with much enthusiasm.  You'll be amazed and encouraged at the creativity you see employed.  And one day, perhaps the fruit of the money invested will be revealed in Eternity.  That's the point!

Here's a great resource for you on this subject - Raising Money-Smart Kids by Ron and Judy Blue

Oh, and BTW - we did increase their allowances as they got older.  To a quarter!  lol!!  JK!!

Less is More - gifts

This is a tough one.  But it's less about being tough on the recipients and more about the giver.  Most of us love to give gifts to those we love!  That's a good thing, to be sure.  But maybe we place too much emphasis on it.  Maybe we are expecting gifts to bring happiness - to others and to ourselves.  Maybe we can find some ways to unplug the "gift machine"without turning into a 21st century Scrooge.

Here are ideas to consider for extended family Christmas gift-giving.  When you propose the idea, time it for July....not December.  Just sayin....

1.  draw names
2.  limit giving to children under 21
3. "goofy gift" - the one with the biggest markdown wins!
4.  yankee swap or white elephant
5.  family gift
6.  service project together  - which is a gift to others instead of one another
7.  the gift of time and labor - one year I gave my Dad "homemade cookies of the month" for a year!

Here are some ideas for your own family-
1.  Limit of 3 gifts (like the Wise Men brought to Jesus).  I really wish I had started this when mine were little.  If it's a tradition, it's a lot of fun.  I am the one that has a hard time limiting the amount of gifts  - the problem is NOT that my kids clamor for more!  So my suggestion is to restrain yourself from the beginning and then you won't have gift-giving withdrawal tremors.
2.  Celebrate like they do in Ethiopia. My friend Amy says that no gifts are given to celebrate Christmas here.  Just food and fellowship.  Oh, YES!
3.  My friend Kimberly tells her kids they get "Something to wear, something to read, something you want and something you need"  Again, I wish I had started early with this one.  For me.

Ideas for bday gifts for friends -
1.  Have a "gift box" where you stockpile gift options that you find on sale.  When it's time for the party, let your child "shop" from your "store".  Prevents overspending at the last minute!
2.  Give gift cards to bookstores or for ice cream
3.  Learn how to make things such as decorative Tshirts or pillowcases or personalized towels
4.  Set the trend of "no gift" bday parties!!

Less is More - re-gift...with a twist

The idea of "re-gifting" is sure to bring a chuckle.  Maybe even a snicker or two.  There are sure to be opinions on both sides of the issue...and certainly some stories!  Stories that are funny or not, depending which side you are on!

Well, this idea for "less is more" puts a twist on re-gifting.  So, if you turn up your nose at the idea, give me a sentence to explain...


Our family has moved a few times and each departure left part of our heart with friends we made along the way.  Each time we moved, precious folks gave us part of their heart to take with us.  As well as gifts that we treasure.  Many pictures and items that decorate our home represent to us dear friends and valued experiences and places full of memories for which we are so grateful.  At one of our moves, a friend bought me a CD of beautiful worship songs.  Every time I played it, I teared up, enjoying the music...and the memories.

A few years later, I was the one staying and a friend was the one doing the moving.  She was one of those gals that "has everything" but I still wanted to give her something that would remind her of how I value our friendship.  That CD came to my mind - it was not just a CD...to me, it was a symbol of friendship and love ...that didn't diminish with distance.  I felt a little nervous - should I give it to her?  Would she think I was cheap?  Or tacky?  Or stupid? 

I took the risk.  She loved it!(At least she said she did!)  And so a new tradition was born.  Since then, when a friend moves out of town (across the neighborhood doesn't count for this -- those folks would just get a house-warming gift!), I ponder what vase or platter or picture or whatever can I share.  Now I'm not talking about something that I don't like and want to get rid of.  (And, in complete spirit of disclosure - so far I haven't re-gifted my set of sterling silver or my grandmother's wedding band!) But I do select something nice.  Something that I think the other person would also like.  And something that will remind them that their friendship is valuable to me.

So, a gift doesn't have to be new or unused or require cash outlay to be significant. To convey love and appreciation and value.  And more.

Less is More - save on dinner

For those of us whose love language is food, it is a challenge to not see every meal as an expression of our affection for our family.  We gotta get over it. We really don't have to create an extravagantly expensive feast for dinner each night.  Rethink it as "love means not wasting the grocery money".

Here's a recipe for easy homemade pizza.  So you can have it other than Tuesdays.

Pizza dough

1/2 to 3/4 cup warm water
1 tbs dry yeast (I purchase mine in bulk at Sams.  Considerably less than the little packets from the grocery store.  You store it in the freezer and get out what you need each time.)
1 tsp sugar
2 cups flour
1 tbs olive or vegetable oil
1/2 tsp salt

Combine 1/4 cup of the water with the yeast and sugar.  Stir to dissolve and let stand for a few minutes while you put the flour, oil, and salt into a food processor.  Whirl it around for a few seconds.  Add the yeast mixture and process for a few more seconds.  Like about 10. Turn on the processor and gradually pour more water through the tube until the dough forms a moist ball.  Whirl it around a few more times - this is in lieu of kneading.
Put the dough ball onto a greased pizza pan. Cover it with plastic wrap and let it sit for about 10 minutes.  Work the dough around until it covers the pan, a higher lip on the edges.  Spread with pizza sauce (thinly - too much is yucky.  I can testify to this).  Add as much mozzarella cheese and whatever toppings you want.  Bake at 425 for about 15 minutes. 

This is really cheap (I estimate a cheese pizza costs about $2) and I promise promise promise that it is not hard.

Less is More -Put it off

Just wanted to check back in out your debt reduction plan.  If you have debt, you really need a plan to get out.  Seriously.  Let me know how you're doing.

Here's today's tip for you - procastinate.

Not really.  But sort of.  Paul and I read the book by David Platt, Radical, and it had some great ideas about how to live a lifestyle that kicks materialism in the teeth. I urge you to read it.  One of our takeaways was to postpone any significant purchases for a year.  In our case, significant included no car replacement, house painting, new roof, or vacation that year.  We seriously did little else other than food, school books, minimal clothes & gifts for a year.I think we could have done with even less, actually.  It was manageable.  And on the gifts thing, we requested that, in lieu of gifts for ourselves, that a donation be made to a couple of charities that we esteem highly.  It was hard for a few relatives but we loved it.  So much that we repeated the request for a couple of years. 

Why don't you try it?  A year with the fewest purchases possible.   What to do with what you don't spend???  Save. Pay off debt.  Give.....